It sucks when you lose a plant. Heading back to get a replacement is just no replacement.
I’ve also been hard at work killing pests. Wasps are very persistent. Whoever put in our soffits used an exacto knife. When I blew the nest out, they returned within days just slightly to the right of it and built a second nest inside another little opening. Since there are many little openings (thanks to the drunken installation of the aluminum) I called a contractor to rip it all out. I can’t wait to see what has been living up there for the last 10 years.
I’ve been listening to Odesza’s A Moment Apart. Brilliant. It goes in the ambient pile and has been suiting me just fine lately.
I have started hanging bunches of basil to dry because both plants are gigantic and producing many leaves. Last year, I dried it in the oven and it was tasteless, like paper. My neighbor at the end of the block gave me some dried lavender from his garden and it was only then that I realized the little flowers, once dried, make for some usage. You really can be an amateur and dry the wrong part of the plant and wonder, why does this smell like rotting leaves? Speaking of my neighbor, he has ALS, he’s in his 50’s. He used to be withholding in conversation, everything was awkward. He explained his recent diagnosis and the potential future, his predicted lifespan. He said he’s been surprised by the kindness of others, he has learned to reach out to ask for help. He is totally different.
Continuing my foray into RomComs, we watched How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days and Elizabethtown last night. Elizabethtown is something special. It captures a special person in action. If you are lucky enough to know one of these people, keep them.
Work is ramping up – peak blast and everyone is on high volume. In the next 3 months I will go to NYC, Seattle, Atlanta, Asheville, Chicago, Oregon, and Phoenix – plus one place my boss won’t tell me about yet. I have been considering what I like best in a job and it’s the autonomy not to be micromanaged, the ability to make decisions. At times, the male domination bothers me so much I let my cup runneth over and my temper takes the place of my normally controlled self. Have you ever let that happen? I return to the daily affirmations. This week, despite my intention to wreck my life, I learned to be a bigger picture person, learned to accept difficult people where they are, to work with what I have, to make something of it.
There is a little Peter cottontail in the yard eating the clover. He has been eating my leaves – he has eaten the flowers off everything, but I see he is looking healthy and he is making me smile. It seems a small price to pay.
My wife opened my world up to Reading Rainbow recently. I ordered a DVD from the library, but you could get the episodes on YouTube right now. The episode Show Way covers so much in 45 minutes. I’d never heard of it. Our age difference and growing up in difference countries interferes just a little sometimes. I look at children’s television now and wonder where all the values have gone. That might sound a little old fart, but seriously, where are your manners, world?!
Engaged in a very productive conversation this week with the local urban planners preparing to present a new plan for a few major streets in my area. These streets are home to many new businesses and they’ve been working hard to fix the area up to welcome them, new patrons, and make the whole area safer in general for people to live and work, park their cars, ride bikes etc. I have really enjoyed reviewing the studies and giving them feedback. It was the first time I realized I have some skills I could use in other industries. It was exciting to feel that kick in, to be able to apply myself to something new. I can see a second career forming. I continue to loathe politicians and religious tyrants and I find they are everywhere attention may be sought.
I have been to the theatre twice in the last 3 weeks. We saw two musicals. I have lived all of my life up until 2 years ago hating musicals, but I have been wrong. $33 a seat for 3 hours filled with a full orchestra, singing, dancing and acting. The people with a Go See a Play bumper sticker are onto something. I need to revisit the opera.
This week, we took a picnic to the park and relaxed beforehand. A little birdy from a nest above us fell 30 feet onto me, was flapping around like crazy, obviously not wanting to be on me and probably surprised he fell out of the nest. I didn’t know where it came from and was shooing it off of me frantically. No harm done. He made his way on the ground, uninjured but not ready to fly, walking slowly away from me and, chirping, found its mother, who had been watching us from a branch the entire time, ready to pounce, and met him by the foot of the tree, out of the way of people, where she stayed with her little baby, no doubt feeding it and caring for it until he could take to flight.
One final note, as the EMDR opens up my mind more and more. I suggest to you the time is now to forgive yourself for your errors, to let go of the past, release bad people away from you, put them far, far away from your every day. You are on your own journey. Don’t forget that.
I’ll leave you with a good quote from Shrii Shrii Anandamurti and Indian philosopher:
You are never alone or helpless. The force that guides the stars guides you too.